I'm just me. Not too ordinary, not too special either. I'm just a woman who loves the colour orange a lot. I'm weird sometimes, but everyone is once in awhile right.

* A life with no worries * My own ride * A PhD in Child clinical psychology * Travel around the world (for real!) * You, the boy with the sweetest smile, yes you

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Sheila
Nad
Devina
Gigi
Herman
Elvira

February 2008
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And the heart speaks "I'm tired, give me a rest and leave me alone for awhile"

When you have a cut, it will heal perfectly. Leaving barely any scar. But is it the same case when you have one on your heart? This is not an emo post, it's just some random thoughts.

Over the past few years, many slashes, bruises, deep cuts. They heal with time, but is there barely any scar? I don't think so. I believe scars are left behind, those that can open up again leaving fresh wound. We don't have much choices do we? We can't choose not to fall in love, we can't choose not to like someone. Maybe we can, but the heart definitely can't. Are we to blame then?

Some quotes I love from Grey's Anatomy. Those that really hit close to home and some that really gave me a lesson.

"What's worse, new wounds which are so horribly painful or old wounds that should have healed years ago and never did. Maybe our old wounds teach us something...they remind us of where we've been and what we've overcome. They teach us lessons about what to avoid in the future. That's what we like to think. But that's not the way it is, is it? Something's we just have to learn over and over and over again."

"The truth is painful. Deep down no body wants to hear it, especially when it hits close to home. Sometimes we tell the truth because the truth is all we have to give. Sometimes we tell the truth because we need to say it out loud to really hear it for ourselves. And sometimes we tell the truth because we just can't help ourselves. And sometimes we tell them because we owe them at least that much."

"Forgive and forget, that's what they say. It's good advice, but it's not very practical. When someone hurts us, we want to hurt them. When someone wrongs us, we want to be right. Without forgiveness, old scores are never settled, old wounds never healed. And the most we can hope for, is that one day we'll be lucky enough to forget."

"You gotta wonder why we cling to our expectations. Because the expected is just what keeps us steady, standing, still. The expected is just the beginning. The unexpected is what changes our lives."

"At the end of the day, when it comes down to it, all we really want is to be close to somebody. So this thing where we all keep our distance and pretend not to care about each other, it's usually a load of bull. [...] The people that are still with you at the end of the day, those are the ones worth keeping. And sure, sometimes close can be too close. But sometimes, that invasion of personal space, it can be exactly what you need."

"Even now I believe for the most part, love is about choices. It's about putting down the poison and the dagger and making your own happy ending, most of the time, and that sometimes despite all your best choices and all your best intentions, fate wins anyway."

Good news first, I got my EOS 450D FINALLY!!!!!!! Haven't really gotten the time to play around with it yet. So happy!

Bad news, I came back from Singapore yesterday. But almost couldn't make it. Reason? Ashamed to admit, I left my passport in a bag, and asked my dad to bring that bag back to Indo ( he left a day earlier). So, I was left without passport to travel! HOW HOW HOW?! In the end, my kind dad bought a ticket and came to Singapore again to pass it to me. I know it costs a lot and I do realyl feel bad about it. *sigh* but there's nothing else I can do. T-T

Lesson learnt: Clear the bag before you change.

P.S: I'm in Indo atm. Going to Bali on Monday. =D Can't wait!