I'm just me. Not too ordinary, not too special either. I'm just a woman who loves the colour orange a lot. I'm weird sometimes, but everyone is once in awhile right.

* A life with no worries * My own ride * A PhD in Child clinical psychology * Travel around the world (for real!) * You, the boy with the sweetest smile, yes you

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February 2008
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"One of the hardest things in life is having words in your heart you can't utter"

The wind is getting warm, the days are getting less depressing. That's when I realise, winter is ending. A part of me is delighted. I am eager to see the blooming flowers, the colourful scenery when I look around. Another part of me is sad to see winter going away. I love the winter. I love the dry crisp air in the morning. Even though days may get really cold especially with the rain, I still love winter. I love having to wear a little more piece of clothings to keep me warm. I love having to fight the wind on those windy days. I guess you can't be selfish. You can't have everything you desire. Season has to change, people have to grow up, days have to go by, years have to pass by. Change is good.. Right?? This is going to sound really ironic. Winter is said to be the most depressing season of all. I do have a love-hate relationship with winter. I get down more easily during winter. And I've heard of SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder) where someone who has this will get super duper depressed during winter up to the point of suicide (Interesting huh).

Spring, not my favourite but I don't hate it either. Nothing much to say about spring. Just that beautiful flowers blooming and happier days ahead! Enjoy the last days of winter people because spring is coming to town.

P.S: Winter in Melbourne is not as beautiful as the picture portray, neither is the spring. Hahaha.

Special weekend this week. Went to party and the 2 lovelies stayed over with Jeannie taking over my personal space (HA!) Awaken at 12 by sms from Erica asking if I was ready to go. Panic!! Replies her message and went back to sleep (WHAT?!!). Woke up 15 minutes later and realise I'm in deep shit. Rushed to the bathroom, get ready. Met them at flinders to eat at TAB. The best fish and chips I guess. Had lunch for awhile then off to Highpoint we go. Met Cindy in footscray and took the bus. Almost got lost but luckily we didn't. Reached there at 3.30PM and realised the mall closes at 5.30PM. o_O Went to valleygirl (main reason I went there, sorry for dragging you guys along. *peace*) After walking around for a bit went to gloria jeans. Had my new favourite creme brulee chillers introduced by Erica.

We reminisced about the past, how different the past was. We used to play with marbles, rubber bands, petak umpet, tak jongkong, tak patung, etc. We concluded that the kids in the past had more fun then the kids in the present (who are more technologically advanced, playing with PSPs, NDS and other video games). Went back after that, cook bihun bakso (meatball vermicilli??) and went to safeway buying ingredients and stuffs. In the end stayed over there. Had fun in the morning (or should I say midday) being woken up with SUPER DUPER SHOCKING NEWS (sense the sarcasm). Ate chicken rice, had fun some more and decided "it was time for me to go home" (line from the song "Big Girls Don't Cry"). And now here I am typing this entry away. It was a really fun weekend. I love meeting the girls every weekend (sorry if you are bored of me.Hehe)

They put a great end to the stressful week. They are the reason I look forward to weekends.
Previous post, I dedicated it to Erica Kosasih and now it's for Jeannie Kosasih (the sister).


Jeannie Kosasih, Jenoi leboiii, cenoiii, etc. (HAHAHA) thank you for making my weekend even more enjoyable. You are such an entertainment!! Thank you for being a listening ear too =) Stop being so pervert please. Hahahaha. I'll go over to clayton lagi deh some time yah. Be a good tour guide! Kissy kissy poo!

A friend (Soegiharto Widjaja) has just brought to my attention that the posts in my blogs are apparently emo. Quoting him "wah ur blog.. sounds abit emo nih".

It got me thinking though. Why do I only write posts that are emo? Out of the 60 something posts I have actually written, you can count with one hand the number of entries that are light-hearted. And I start to search myself the reason for this imbalance. I found a reason that may or may not satisfy you my friend.

The thing is, I like happy times. I enjoy them sooo much I never want to let them go. The moments are so precious that I just want them kept in my memories. You may think "what has it got to do with not writing them down in your blog?" I always believe that when you write something in a blog, it is your way of letting go. It is your way of venting your emotion and just getting rid of whatever you're feeling. I'm so afraid that by writing down the happy times, I'd soon forget about them. Will I?

To my friend, thank you for the advice of "look at glasses that are half full rather than half empty"

A cliche quote some of you may say. But it gives a whole new different meaning when it comes from a friend when compared to you reading it yourself. =)

I guess from this moment on I do have to learn writing a more light-hearted post and stop complaining a lot yeah? Hahaha.

I'm supposed to be doing my Development essay right now but heck, my brain is out of juice. =_=
So, instead, I'm going to update this dusty blog *blows off dust* as requested by xxx whoever you are.

Life hasn't been that interesting lately. Basically, I've just been going to uni and meeting my best best best friend in the world Erica Kosasih on the weekend. She's here on exchange and I'm so glad. She helps me through a lot of things this past 4 weeks. I keep bothering her with my ranting and complaints. But she never once showed that she's bored or can't be bothered. She is the one person that keeps me grounded to earth and reality. When I start to think too positively of something uncertain, she pulls me back to where I am by saying things that actually make sense. I love her frankness, honesty, fearless comments. I love her for being who she is. =)

Anyhoots, I miss Indo =(

I heard something break. It was so loud that I swear I was becoming deaf. I looked around trying to identify the source of the noise. I could find nothing. Everything is prim and proper. Nothing seems to be out of place. Nothing is scattered on the floor. I forgot to look inside myself... When I did look, it was too late. Something already crumbles into thousands and millions of pieces. It was beyond repair, beyond mending. No wonder I don't feel a thing anymore. It is all gone. I feel NUMB... And it's all because of you.